A Story

So God has finished making the world, and all the parts in it. He calls up all the humans, and starts giving them their respective countries. The Canadians receive their sprawling tundras, the Nepalese their high mountains, Kenyans their expansive grasslands. The whole endeavor took a really long time, but at the end of the day, all the peoples of the world had their own special place.

Except for the Georgians.

They had been busy partying at a supra, and missed their turn to receive their country. Stumbling up to God hours after the fact, they apologized, and asked where they could go.

"Sorry, guys," God said. "There's no world left for you."

"Vaimeeeeeeeeee!" the Georgians drunkenly cried.

God felt bad about this, and pondered what he could do for this group of people who were oozing chacha out of their very pores. He sighed with his final decision.

"There is one small part of this world left, and I had made it for myself. And since you need your own home, and I'm God, I guess I can give you my little corner."

And God transported the supra'd Georgians to their new home, which they called Sakartvelo - or Georgia.

Moral of the story, kids:

Get too drunk and fat at parties when you have important shit to do, and it will all work out in even better ways than you could have hoped for!

Bako

This is Bako.

Well, her name is Bako now. Two weeks ago, when she wandered into our house, I was calling her "little dog" or "scrappy face."

It all started out innocently enough. When I first found her on our couch, I was home alone and heard a weird noise in our sitting room, kind of like a yippy whine. And that's when I saw her curled up on the cushions. I'd wondered a lot of times if my family had ever had a stray dog come into the house since we just leave the door open in the day when we're home. That query has now been answered, and it is yes - stray dogs can just wander in if they so fancy.

I brought her outside, and we ended up playing a bit in the courtyard once she stopped cowering out of fear because of the whole me being a human thing. I figured that she would be a one day visitor - a transient in our backyard, just like the little black dog from January was, and who the mangey pointer mix who roams around the neighborhood is. But the next day when I left to go to school, this little mutt came bounding over, and walked me to the gate. When I got home she crashed into my legs, tail wagging happily. The day after was the same. This dog stuck around the house, and has become our own ardent defender, barking at people down by the riverbed behind the house, and chasing birds, cats, and even the hens from nextdoor who wander into our garden.

She is really young - so young that I wonder where exactly her mother is - but she seems to have taken to us nicely. My host siblings are pretty indifferent towards her, which is weird, because they have been talking for months about how they want a dog, and now here one is and they couldn't give half a shit. Bebia and my host mom claim to not like her, yet they both collect leftover scraps of food from meals and give it to Bako in her own little dish outside. They both also talk to her when they're outside, although since it's Georgian I can never really tell if they're happy with her or want to kill her. I decided to just ask if they actually liked her so that I could stop blind guessing based on intonation and vocalization, which was getting me absolutely nowhere. My host mom said that she likes her outside only, but not when she is inside, where Bako frequently tries to sneak into.

Or, should I say, she did try to frequently sneak into. Until yesterday.

Yesterday, my host mother returned home to another pair of chewed slippers. Bako has the unfortunate [puppy] habit of gnawing on things, particularly shoes that are just left outside the front door, which is where my family just happens to leave most of theirs. I suppose the third pair of outdoor shoes was the last straw, so my mom got a belt. I was unaware of the previously mentioned chewed slippers, so I was really happy to see that the family was finally embracing this little puppy, and was giving her a collar of her own! I figured an old belt, one that no one cared about, would be the perfect puppy collar if you poked a hole in it at the right place and cut the excess down!

Only, that's not what happened.

 What happened instead was a little horrifying to watch, even though it wasn't all that surprising.

My host mom left the long bit of the belt and tried to use it as a leash. Bako has a tendency of cowering down and not moving if you pay direct attention to her while you are walking, so onto her belly she went, and was essentially dragged across the yard. Not in a malicious way or anything, but still it was pretty jarring to see. My mom then got a long piece of old electrical wire we're not using anymore and looped it through one of the belt holes, tying this to a tree by our wood pile.

So that's where Bako is now. This little puppy is confined to the circle that her five foot long lead will allow, half of which is woodpile and rock wall. She has food, water, and a sled to lay on, sure, but she's a puppy, and she sort of needs more than that.

And at least Bako is better off than my friend Chris's dog Maximus, who has a broken leg (from being hit by a fucking car) that's never healed so he can't walk on it. This dog was also, over Thanksgiving, shot or stabbed or something, which is where he got this nice little gaping wound from. He's still alive and kicking, happily living his life which is full of chasing cars down the street and trying to hump every dog in the Akhmeta district. So I mean, shit could be worse.

I'm really conflicted about all of this. I'm absolutely not ok with it, because I'm a dog person, and have issues with how this country handles dogs and their training - or should I say lack thereof - but I understand why it's happened.

This is the easiest solution to the problem of a stray dog coming into the house and serial eating your slippers and shoes.

The second easiest solution is to not leave the front door of your house wide open, and keep your shoes inside. But this house runs cold, and keeping the door open in the day helps get some warm air inside. So I get why my family doesn't want to have the door closed. And as far as the shoes being outside, I think this is just a habit that they don't want to give up, because in winter we kept all our shoes right by the door inside no problem.

The third easiest solution is to get a screen door, or a gate. But again, this is assuming the capital to do either of those things, and while my family is pretty well off I don't think a screen door to keep a stray dog out from their house is seen as a wise investment. Even if it is, but whatever. Their house, their decisions.

I wish I could be more bent out of shape about this, but every time I try to write something expressing my indignation I remember where I am and I just can't keep it on the page.

This country, like most developing places - I won't say countries, because there are plenty of locations inside countries that are better off than Georgia where dogs are treated this bad or worse - doesn't have the economic hardiness to deal with humans taking care of humans, let alone humans taking care of animals in a non working or livestock fashion. And even then, I've yet to see a horse or a cow here who isn't completely shaggy and in bad need of a brush.

But pet culture just isn't a thing here. People want to say they have pets, because they see it in movies; they see the whole Western world running around in yoga pants with some purebred dog on a beach and they want that, too. They just are unable to have that idealized vision for numerous reasons - lack of understanding of dog training; lack of capital to provide the animal it's own basic needs; lack of willingness to allow something into your house which culturally is seen as either a nuisance or an outdoor worker. I've yet to meet a dog anywhere in Georgia that lives in the house. I just don't think it happens all that much, especially in the smaller towns and villages.

So I understand all of it. But that doesn't mean I have to agree with it.

Commie Fun Park

I had a pretty surreal afternoon on Saturday. My friend Christine and I ventured up to the Mtatsminda park, which is a theme park of sorts that sits on top of one of Tbilisi's hills. It's accessible one of two ways - a bus which takes you way round the back of the hill and steadily up, or by the funicular. What's a funicular, you ask? It's this weird railway train thing that has two cars. They are at the opposite ends of the line and, through a pulley system, counterbalance each other to take passengers either up or down. 

It's actually a pretty neat thing, even if it isn't the smoothest ride. The last time I was on it was during orientation, all those months ago. Young, naive Jo was slightly alarmed at the jerky ride, the heartstopping pauses and jolts, constantly worrying that one of the cables would snap and that we would all plummet down to our deaths hundreds of feet below us. 

However, since spending a little more time here, where absolutely nothing is in my control, I've become sort of a fatalist. Not that I'm hoping to die or anything, but what the hell is the point in being worried constantly about near death experiences since I can't do anything to prevent them? It's been an enjoyable time in marshrutkas since I gave up caring about how drivers liked to pass each other at absurd speeds around blind corners, and this trip up to Mtatsminda was a far more pleasant experience than it had been the first time, as well. 

It's a pretty steep ascent, and that little white dot way up there is only the halfway point where there is, naturally, a church. Because Tbilisi loves its churches.

The funicular station at the top doubles as a restaurant as well, offering stunning panoramas of Tbilisi from the highest point around which you can enjoy with some beer, wine, and decent food. Upon leaving the station, you're dumped in front of a wide, gently sloped set of stairs, generously broken up by little platforms with various carnival type rides. You can also go right, and follow the ridge of the mountain where there are a bunch of game stands with very scary looking stuffed animals as prizes. The signs are super helpful for letting you know where you need to go. I'm glad that, since this is Georgia, there is of course a wedding hall in an amusement park.

There are also really creepy statues, like the one below. The more horrifying part of them, though, is the sheer size. This way-too-pleased-with-itself fat baby cherub thing is easily 15 feet tall, and is on the main entrance for the park. 

Basically, if you take Disneyland, reduce the budget of it by millions of dollars, and add 1970's Soviet vibe to it, you'll have the decor of this park.

Which isn't to say that there is a lack of cool shit up there, because that's not true. There's a gigantic ferris wheel that goes around and around at a snails pace. It's also right at the very edge of the hill, and that makes me more than a little nervous, so I've only ever visited the bar at the bottom of it. Shocker, I know.

There's also a pretty decent looking roller coaster, but it wasn't running on Saturday. Underneath the coaster, in a concrete space reminiscent of a parking lot, is the Go-Kart track. Georgian Go-Karts are apparently just small four-wheelers. And there are only two of them. Don't worry, though. You get a helmet for the ride, too! Or at least I think you do. There were two of them off to the side at least, so they might have just been for decoration. Like the roller coaster above, the Go-Karts were also not operational.

My favorite part of the park, though, is the Dinosaur Experience. Just past the ferris wheel is a small fenced off area with animatronic prehistoric creatures. They're motion activated, and don't do anything too crazy - opening their mouths in roars that aren't synchronized with the soundtrack, blinking with eyelids that needed to be replaced ten years ago because they had holes in the lids, wagging their arms around in weird little robotic dances. The trail takes you around the perimeter of the area, and is doable in probably five minutes.

We of course took almost fifteen, since most of the robots were exceptionally hilarious, such as the Ornithomimus making some incredibly weird sounds. I've been trying to upload a video of it, but it's not letting me. However, if you have an iPhone, go to Settings>Sounds>Ringtone>Classic>Old Car Horn and that is exactly the sound that one of the dinosaurs was emitting. I'm no Robert T. Bakker, but I feel like there's something off about this interpretation of saurian vocalizations...

What I was really excited for, and what made the two lari admission price to the dinosaur area really worthwhile (oh yeah, I forgot to mention that you have to pay a few lari for all the janky rides and attractions at the top, since admission is free), was the prospect of riding this Pachyrhinosaurus. The attendant lady unfortunately dashed that hope, so this was the best I could do. Which I guess for being a 27 year old in an exhibit obviously targeted at those twenty years younger than me isn't too bad. I just really liked his shocked and concerned little face.

We explored pretty much all of the park, and while it was fairly slow and quiet that day, I feel like it's anarchy and pure chaos in the warm summer months. There are a ton of water features reminiscent of Splash Mountain, as well as numerous fountains that are obviously designed for children to run around in. Take any carnival you've ever seen, put those rides on top of a park, and voila - you have Mtatsminda.

There's also a little roller coaster for children, and we of course had to ride that. We wanted to ride the big coaster, dammit, and since that was closed, this kiddy one (called the "Happy Train," just by the way) would have to do! Who cares if we were the oldest people on the ride with no youngsters of our own, and who cares if we were laughing like complete goobers the whole time, and putting our hands up on the hills that were only a five foot drop. We were having fun, dammit! Which is more than we can say about all the actual children on the ride, most of whom were just staring straight ahead and weren't smiling or giggling or giving any indication of fun-havingness. The only reaction on any of them was one girl at the very front of the train who was unafuckingmused by us, and spent the entire time glaring at the two idiotic Americans cackling in the back cart.

Christine was most excited to do the Bumper Cars, so as we were on our way out of the park we stopped by. And of course, given our location, it couldn't just be normal Bumper Cars. No. There had to be furries on them. We hypothesized that this is what bored carnies are apt to do when days are slow. They had their costume heads over on the side, and stayed in the cars for consecutive rides. I guess when your job is "Be A Dog That Gives Balloons To Screaming Children," riding the Bumper Cars endlessly and for free is a perk.

The whole day was just full of weird, surreal little things like that. There are some Saint Bernards that are an attraction all their own - they don't do anything, and you can't pet them, and they're in a really remote part of the park. They just sit/sleep and you can take pictures of them. The old and broken parts of rides and attractions are just kind of thrown behind thin stands of trees, and you're able to get back and poke around them. There's a Ghost Castle which isn't open right now either, but there are attendants on the upper balconies of it who wave at you and call out, "Hello! How are you!", because even from thirty feet away it's wickedly obvious you're a foreigner. There are big paper mache mice at a supra, and a few roundabouts and swings for kids to play on that are chained and bolted to the ground, forbidding both the roundabouting and the swinging. And maybe these are all just side effects of the park being in offseason, but part of me really doubts that it will get all that "normal" come July.

We ended our little afternoon up at Mtatsminda grabbing a beer and some snacky foods, all the while making our own version of Cards Against Humanity: Georgian Edition. Christine and I spent most of the day in the park laughing ridiculously hard and having an insane amount of goofy fun and, judging by the wi-fi password for the restaurant, Mtatsminda thinks we're just as good of a time!

We need to have a chat...

I've been toying with making this post for a while now, but I can't really keep my mouth shut about it anymore.

I am sick to death of people hating on Russia and the Olympics - not that I don't agree with most points made, but because you're all doing it for the wrong fucking reasons.

Yes, the state of the Olympic Village is a joke. Yes, Russia should have gotten its shit together and made it actually functional in time for the games and the arrival of the Olympians. However, that's kind of an outrageous expectation given the infrastructure of the area. So why the Olympic Committee decided to award the winter games to a place where they don't have, I dunno, decent running water, let alone SNOW, is beyond me, but they did.

I'm used to janky shit here. This is nothing shocking. Professionally, sure, be indignant about it I guess? There are worse things to do than going to a bedroom to check into a hotel?

Welcome to Eastern Europe?

Done this more than once. Continue to feel like a rockstar, and know that there are people all over the world who don't have clean water to drink, let alone wash their faces with.

Yeah, sorry. I'm gonna put this under the category of "stop being a pussy, please." This is what you're the most surprised about? This? Seriously? Have you ever been outside of your house? I know plenty of places in the States where you can't flush the toilet paper. Plus, hey, guys! Be thankful you have Western toilets! They could've given you the middle finger and made you all use squat toilets, which guess what! Are even MORE of a culture shock than having to throw your toilet paper in a trash can!

Now, I realize that from a worldwide standpoint, maybe if you're hosting the Olympics you should maybe not suck ass at it. And sure. I'm with you guys on that. But there are way more grievous things in play that we need to discuss.

And I'm not even talking about the killing of the stray dogs, which is a whole other diatribe. 

Yes, it's sad. I love dogs. I think dogs are the best fucking things on this planet. I think life is vastly improved by dogs in ways that are immeasurable. If I have to categorize myself, I would put a check in the box next to "Dog Person." But that's because I'm from the first world. I've got the capital to sit there and even entertain the notion of a "pet," since that whole concept is a first world ideal. Dogs in developing nations everywhere are either help or pests. They don't live in your homes, they don't snuggle with you and make you feel better. They live their lives herding your sheep, defending your cows, guarding your house, or dumpster diving. That's it. Many of them have all sorts of parasites and diseases, rabies being among them. So what was it exactly that Sochi was supposed to do with their dogs? Round them up and adopt them? To who? Russians? Russians who can't even feed their families, let alone carry the extra burden of an animal? 

Again, I think it's a sad place to be in when shooting huge amounts of animals is the only viable option, but that's kind of the grim reality of being in the developing world. And while it makes me sad and my stupid little heart breaks every time I see some mangey starving stray, I think the global discussion needs to actually be turned to the malnutrition of the kids in these places before we can think about imposing our own cultural frames of "what is right" on places that don't have the same problems we, ourselves, do. Basically what I'm saying is this - when my third graders will stop having brown teeth due to vitamin deficiency and lack of basic dental care, then I will worry about the stray dog population of the developing world. Until then, humans first.

Speaking of humans, yeah, Russia's anti-gay movement is awful. I think it's terrible, and fascist and a million other words to describe the sheer monstrousness of it. But what kills me are the Americans acting all superior over them. Hey! Americans! Take a look at our own country! People are still regularly beat up for liking the same gender. We're still shocked when someone says, "I'm gay." Only 17 of our states have legalized same sex marriages, while numerous others still don't allow it because it's against their own stately constitutions. I don't think we really get to sit there and wag the finger at Russia, guys. Yes, we're taking huge steps forward, and I love that, and we are definitely on the right track! I'm not trying to detract anything from the progress that's been made in regards to the LGBT community, and not trying to say they shouldn't be excited about what's been going on! I just am not really sure we get to be high and mighty with anyone in regards to gay rights at the moment.

But human rights haven't ever really been something the Russian government has paid attention to. Hundreds of thousands were deported from the Caucasus Mountains area during Soviet times; an act later renamed as a "genocide," especially in regards to the Chechen population. The destruction of religious spaces and cultural points of pride in Georgia alone is infuriating, and that's not even counting the annihilation of ethnic groups in Abkhazia, Ossetia, Dagestan, and Chechnya. And that's only this in this small part of the world; that's ignoring all of the westerly post-Soviet satellite states, like Ukraine, which are a whole other can of worms.

The catalyst for me finally making this post, however, was an article sent to me by a friend and fellow TLG volunteer. Although it's all in Russian, a quick trip to Google Translate helped suss out what all it was saying. This is a transcription of a security conference held in Armenia, with several Russian officials in attendance. Below are some of the best gems:

"Fundamental importance for Russia and the Eurasian Union is the Central Caucasus . Here is the key to security in the region , a direct military access to the Middle East, the most convenient corridor for overland trade with Iran, Iraq , Turkey. Russia needs direct transport infrastructure and access to Armenia to maintain combat capability and capacity building military base in Gyumri . Now , many questions arise in Yerevan , how will the economy of the CU and the EEC , the Eurasian Union without a common border . This topic will be removed in the near future . Direct border between Armenia and Russia , the Eurasian Union and Armenia will be installed in the next 2-4 years , Russia will have direct access to Armenia , and Armenia in Russia , unhindered access to the Black and Caspian Seas."

"Such withdrawal will be implemented as a result of continuing the process of changing the borders in the Caucasus, the establishment of new fair borders , corresponding to the new economic and political realities . The basis of the new realities - the development of transport corridors , which was laid in the Russian Empire , developed in the Soviet Union , and will be actively developed in the framework of the Eurasian Union."

"Rapid implementation of these projects is related to the just decision of the Ossetian issue that has not yet been finally resolved . There is a recognized Russian Republic of South Ossetia ( RSO ), but the boundaries that it takes , the boundaries of the former South Ossetian Autonomous Oblast ( YUOAO ) within the Georgian SSR does not correspond to historical reality and notions of justice. Most recently, in the early 90 - ies of XX century from the inner regions of modern Georgia was expelled about 100,000 Ossetians. Most of them were squeezed out of the Trialeti Ossetia (region , which was supposed to , but did not enter the early 20 -ies in YUOAO ) , Gori and Kazbek district of Georgia. Accordingly, there is a question of respect for human Ossetian refugees to return and the establishment of fair borders in the Caucasus with the inclusion of the United Ossetia , Gori District WG Trialeti Ossetia , Kazbek district and district WG They . Thus, under the control of Russia would Transcaucasian highway exit to Armenia , Georgian Military Highway , linking Vladikavkaz and Tbilisi and Ossetian Military Road, which after laying asphalt fabric tie Northern Caucasus to Western Georgia and Batumi port . Changing borders Ossetia will promote Eurasian transport infrastructure in the Caucasus. Transcaucasian highway and railway through South Ossetia (including Gori district and Trialet Ossetia ) will get access to the Akhalkalaki and Akhaltsikhe present-day Georgia and then to Armenia and Iran."

"These changes are objective, natural and inevitable . Russia several times went to the Caucasus in its history , and Russia has always returned to the Caucasus. And each time you return changed regional boundaries and economic schemes . They have already started to change with the emergence and recognition of Abkhazia and South Ossetia. This process is not yet finished . It will create a new regional infrastructure and the new Eurasian reality that will give a new impetus to Russian- Iranian cooperation in the South Caucasus."

Sorry that they're not smaller snippets, but this is kind of a huge issue, and it's one that hasn't been discussed AT ALL in the English speaking world. What Armenia and Russia are wanting would mean no more Georgia. It would mean Georgia becomes a part of the Russian Federation again. This is a super nationalistic group of people. They're not going to just give up their country so that Russia and Armenia can be buddies. Not to get all dramatic on everyone, but this is basically Russia and Armenia saying they don't give a shit if they have to take this land by force which, spoilers, they will have to. 

I don't know how high up the man who was quoted saying all of that is. But the fact that it was discussed openly at all makes me really uncomfortable. Infrastructure changes aside, it's going to be a huge drain on this region in terms of resources and human life, neither of which it can really afford. 

"These changes are objective, natural and inevitable." 

This is some scary shit, everyone. So can we please get off the toilet-indignity train and start being pissed about the Olympics for actual reasons?

The full, translated, text from the Russian article is available after this jump:

A Nice Chart

The dotted line represents my level of acceptance and tolerance for Georgian Boy Shit.

It's amusing, because right as I was making the y-axis for this graph, something happened. 

Ani, earlier tonight, changed the password on her Skype account so that Goga could not get online and talk to her friends. I think that's a pretty fair thing, honestly, especially because most Georgian boy interactions with people involve them just yelling or making really loud and obnoxious noises or banging their hands on something. Basically, as long as they can make a lot of noise, and get a response out of you, Georgian boys are all about it.

So Goga gets on the computer at his designated time (my host sibs get into a lot of fights about who gets the computer for how long), which is just after Ani has relinquished the device. She comes over and sits next to me on the couch, and I quickly hide my Photoshop activities because her English is good enough to see what I'm doing. She's very proud of herself for changing the password, and tells me so. About six seconds later, a dismal cry comes from Goga, and he grabs a pencil and throws it at her. She laughs as she ducks away from it, and laughs more as he grabs another pencil and chucks it in the direction of her head.

And this is where things really escalated quickly.

We went from the pencils, to the foot long metal tongs that we use to stoke the petchie fire with, to a chair, and then a stool, and then just fists and feet. My host sibs were throwing the chairs and stools, punching each other, kicking each other, crying the whole time, running around the room crashing into things, and then just screaming at each other. All the while, my host grandmother is yelling at them, trying to get in between them, hitting Goga on the back while saying, "BOY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING" and my host mother, serenely, gets up from the couch and shuts down the computer without saying a word.

Once that happened, Goga ran into the living room bawling, and Ani screamed at him more before storming, also crying furiously, into the bathroom which, subsequently, sports the only lockable door in the house. 

And I'm just sitting here now, asking myself, "What the fuck just happened?" What more perfect timing for all this shit to go down than when I'm in the middle of making a graph to deal with my wanting to choke my host brother.

Oh, life. You've a funny way of working.

But seriously. They really need to go back to school. I cannot deal with another week of them being HOME constantly. When it's just the three of us in the early afternoon it's alright. Not the best, not the worst. Ani and I have a good time, but Goga is an eleven year old boy who loves to harass his older sister, and he knows exactly how to push her buttons so that even a very pleasant moment of us making cookies suddenly turns into a screaming match in Georgian where I feel like they're going to kill each other. 

Goga is your typical boy, especially for here. He gets into fights at school, he laughs way too loud, yells about most things instead of just speak at a normal volume, cries when he doesn't get his way (like when he doesn't know how to do his math homework so he whines at Ani and if she ignores him he cries and starts throwing things at her until she finally gives in and does the equations for him. That happens all the fucking time and it is infuriating.). You know, all sorts of things that I hate when anyone anywhere from any culture does. 

He's also, this week, started to do the most annoying thing ever. It's something that my particularly crappy students do, and I cannot express to you the level of homicidal feelings it induces in me.  I can't help but think they believe they're being hilarious because they know how fucking annoying it is. It happens no matter what question you ask of them - "How are you," "How is your day," "What day is it today," "Do you like the color blue." Questions that they know. Questions that are posed to them every single day. Questions that, even if you ask in Georgian, they answer "Yes" or "No" until my coteacher screams at them to not be smart asses. 

I'm used to it at school. Not at home. Home is like my sacred space for non-assholery child interactions. Ani is hilarious and awesome and we get along great. I'm not super close with my brother, though, because Goga's English is not that good. He knows more than he thinks, and can understand a good bit, but he is nowhere near the level that Ani is. I always make sure I speak to him only in English, and I always keep it even more simple than I do with my sister, but this week he's really pushing my buttons. His response, to anything, is always, "Yes." Or, "No, no no!" 

Now, you might be saying, "Wow, this chick is just a bitch with children!"

No, I'm really not. I've actually got a pretty decent maternal side [sometimes]. I just really hate assholes. Unfortunately, many children go through phases of being assholes as they grow, so I'm naturally disinclined to like them. I don't discriminate by age or gender or anything like that - an asshole is an asshole and they really just make me want to punch them in the face. Do I feel bad that sometimes it just happens to be a fifth grade boy? No. I don't.

So a typical interaction for us will be something like this:

Me, sitting on the couch, mindlessly surfing around on the internet. Goga comes and sits next to me and just watches my screen.

Me: What're you doing, tough guy? (a really frequent question I ask him or my sister.)

Goga: Yes, yes.

Me:  What? That's not an answer. How are you?

Goga: Yes. ....No. No! 

Me: Shen "yes" khar? (sometimes when I phrase what the fuck it is that they're saying, in Georgian, they realize how stupid they sound.)

Goga: laughs and claps his hands loudly Fine, thanks, and you? 

Me: I'm good. notice him looking at my screen and trying to figure out what the weird nebula picture Hubble took is Do you like space?

Goga: points at the screen and then claps his hands all while yelling Yes, yes yes yes yes really loudly and laughing

Me: Wow! I like space a lot, too! High five! puts hand up for a high five

Goga: high fives and then springs up from the couch, making incomprehensible loud yelling noises of a really ear shattering high pitched frequency, while stomping his feet and clapping his hands and then waving his hands in my face before he backs up about four feet from the couch and starts doing random Georgian traditional dance moves. All while yelling.

I really wish I was exaggerating, but that exact scenario happened a few days ago, and the laughing and making loud noises part has been a common interaction between us for while now. The difference being the kind of shit I just described isn't very frequent - on average it happens maybe once a month. And I can deal with that. 

What I can't deal with is this shit happening every.single.day.this.week. He's like a bored puppy. He's just been sitting around the house and has all of this energy and the only way he seems able to get rid of it is by being an asshole. His level of douchebaggery has skyrocketed over the last few days, and all I want to do is punch him in his smug little face.

I think I'm extra annoyed by my host siblings skipping school because it means they're always HERE. Normally, after school, I get a few hours of quiet time to myself. Time where I can put on some music and drink some tea and draw or read or write or do whatever the hell I want. It's wonderful. It's oftentimes my favorite part of the day because apparently I'm an antisocial bitchzoid. So this week has been extra taxing on top of the increased levels of Georgian Boy Shit that my brother is exuding. 

I love my host family. I really do. They're really great, and funny, and have been nothing but fucking wonderful with me. However, if my siblings do not go back to school next week, I will probably kill them. Or go insane and run out of the house laughing and ripping my hair out. Either way, it won't be pretty. So let's all hope that next week brings warmer temperatures, yeah?

Peace out, 2013!

Last year I got a little daily planner with the intention of drawing in it at least once a day. I wanted to see if I would be able to not only come up with something original every day for a year, but also keep at a creative habit for the duration of those 52 weeks.

It was my inner fat kids version of going to the gym resolution.

I'm happy to say that 365 days later, I totally succeeded! Sure, some days I got lazy and only scribbled a stick figure or something stupid, but I did it!

Looking back on it, there were plenty of times that I was annoyed [first world problems, anyone?] I had to draw something on any given day, but there are also a lot of little memories sprinkled within all of these that make me remember sort of obscure details I probably would have forgotten. Memory is a funny thing - how itty bitty doodles of completely random things are able to trigger such vivid recollections of tiny, often insignificant, moments. There are many times looking back through this notebook that I remember where I was when I drew something, or I know exactly what I was feeling when it was being made, even if it was totally unrelated. This is definitely something I'll keep doing in future years, and I've even purchased my next planner for the coming days (it's so much fancier than this one, too! I can like, put a photo in the clear front slip of it! So now I'm stuck in this huge debate about what picture I like enough to put in there and stare at for the rest of my life! Conundrums!)!

2013 was a pretty rollercoastery year, as most tend to be. There were many defining moments, huge emotional swings within the span of hours, tried lots of new things, and even failed at a few of them. It's nice to leave the year with no big regrets, though. It's a new feeling, and I really like it. I'm walking into 2014 with more confidence than ever before (I don't even get uncomfortable looking in a mirror anymore!), a keen understanding that sometimes you need to just say fuck it and jump, and that the fuck it and jump mentality applies not only to new experiences, but to people, too. 

I'm not really sure what the hell the second half of 2014 will entail, since that's when I come back to America and start dealing with big girl problems like "getting a real job" and "paying my student loans." But I'm pretty sure that if a single mom with three kids can work and go to school and stay afloat that I'll be fine, also. Especially now that I'm armed with janky developing world solutions to pesky problems like "having a lot of things." Thank you, Georgia!

Basically, what I'm trying to say is this:

Triumphant fist and everything!

Daily Dose of WTF

I've learned to stop questioning a lot of my day to day routine. 

However.

When there's a space heater on top of the toilet, I really need to ask "why?"